i frequently see depictions of self care as indulgent and enjoyable–full stop. and while it certainly can be that, self care can also be hard. work.

one of the major self care challenges that comes up a lot is around having to make executive decisions when things already feel hard. for example, when you don’t have an appetite but know you need to eat in order to feel better, or if you’re having a crying jag and want to decompress with some netflix but don’t know what would calm your system.

sometimes the easiest way to make sure your self care is accessible to you in crisis is to make these kinds of decisions ahead of time. for example, i keep notes about what foods i know i can make (depending on my level of energy) or order when my appetite is not cooperating but my body and brain need fuel. because i’ve historically struggled with perfectionism and black-and-white thinking, this also gives me permission to get takeout even if i have food at home or to eat a handful of nuts or piece of fruit instead of a full nutritious meal.

this photo is of honey hi, which serves fresh, seasonal, satisfying and fully gluten-free fare in los angeles and is one of my favorite self care “shortcuts.”

what are some areas of self care that can be challenging and shortcuts that you have developed to show up for yourself?